Straight (?) out of left field

Well, I’ve made it at last. So I’ll start with a big hello and an equally big thank you to my fellow espiritoart blogger Mr Warnes. My dear business partner, friend, collaborative artist (erm!) and of course flatmate - thank you for the splendid introduction to me - for building such an anti-climactic sense of anticipation ahead of my first appearance.

Now let’s see. So far, you’ve showed my first and last attempt at a fine art painting (perhaps the removal of the letters 'i', 'n' and 'e' would be more appropriate) and promised our loyal band of followers (!!!!) a forthcoming foray in to the world of 'Andy's hair styling tips'!!!!!!!!!!!!

You’ve driven me off road from my original journey - to begin a ‘retrospective on the mountain pass’ to launching espiritoart. And to shed some light (and hopefully some laughs) on the tribulations of trying to dream up and launch a business. Not to mention a debacle in Milan which ripped up our embryonic enterprise, threatened to implode our friendship and in our subsequent self analysis and loathing- caused us to question our very sanity as 30 year old human beings.

All that can wait until next time. Instead I feel compelled to change tack and consider society’s perceptions of our very own relationship. You see it was the ‘hair tips’ that finished me off…..

That we decided to start a business together, naturally required us to spend a lot of time together. The business happens to be art and we happen to live together some of the time (oh, and we also have high-pitched voices). As a result, society unforgivingly tends to pass immediate judgement on our sexuality. Why?

Admittedly, those who know us well, will also be aware of our shared love for red wine (although not on nights out drinking - a social faux pas), for eating out together, visiting art exhibitions, going for walks and playing tennis together. Our friends derive only gleeful piss-taking pleasure from these extra-curricular activites and in fairness - if all this is not gay what is?

Well you see, perhaps our collective mindset as a society - and I include us - has not progressed as much as you might think. Pigeon-holing people by their likes and dislikes still has a profound impact on all of our lives, even though we are the very people who allow these social barriers to flourish.

Perhaps its a northern thing, but we too don’t drink red wine in a bar because ‘it’s gay’. Why? We like the taste, it’s not more expensive than a beer or a Johnnie Walkers and we don’t have a prejudiced bone in our fattening bodies. Differences in creed, colour or sexuality don’t even emit the faintest signal on either of our radars - we’ve both had friends with sexual leanings different to our own and I’ve had Black and Asian girlfriends.

Yet albeit only very occasionally, we still alter our behaviour, whether consciously or subconsciously. Perhaps because the ‘gay’ jibe can still be irksome due to the backward dogma it radiates. We, despite our liberal views, can still fall into an abyss just short of the moral high ground we aspire to.

Anyway before I sign-off. Trevor Sorbie moulding mud is just perfect for a spiked firm hold. Apply just a spot to the palm, rub gently and then firmly in to the hair. Repeat small applications (less is always more) and alternate between using the palm and the fingertips on the hair . It will provide a non-greasy, dry, natural look and will stay upright for as long as any teenage boy eating Viagra off Beyonce’s boobs.

Seeing as this my first blog entry.… a bonus. Forget the expensive designer moisturisers - and get yourself a great big tub of aqueous cream for £1.99 at the local chemists. Wash your face with it and then apply after drying. And the good news - not only will you have nice smooth skin, the tub will last you a month!

Till the next time - when we get back on the ’pass’.